The Action Man I remember growing up with

Is it just me or is Action Man no longer the super-cool action hero I grew up with?

I remember my first Action Man figure. He was different to other action figures in that he was larger, had that real fuzzy, flocked hair and hands that GRIPPED! Wow! I thought he was great. He didn't need any gimmicks to be cool. You could dress him according to whatever covert operation you were sending him on (which ranged from infiltrating Soviet missle bases to turning the sprinklers off for Mum). I guess that makes him a male Barbie doll, but at least Action Man dressed for a purpose rather than for any fashion reasons.

Then there was a lull in the world of Action Man.

But now he's back, and I wish I could say better than ever. First to go was the fuzzy hair. Apparently the fuzzy hair isnt 'groovy' enough for todays kids, so now it's back to the old moulded and sprayed hair. That sucked.

I thought "Hmm.. 'Tis but a small setback for Action Man...", but I was wrong. With the re-release of AM, there were a few good figures, from the good old-fashioned American hero type, to the new Ninja Action Man. But what came next?

Rollerblading Action Man.

Roller-bloody-blading Action Man.

Dear Lord. This sucked. He looked like a reject from Starlight Express (and that's saying something) with a cardboard box on his head. "Please redeem yourself Action Man! Don't sell out!" I cried to myself everytime I saw that advert on the telly.

I turned on my television this morning. What do you think I saw? Photographer Action Man. ACTION MAN IS NOT A BLOODY PHOTOGRAPHER! He's an action hero! He's a spy! He's a secret agent! He's an international icon! He is not a bloody rollerblading photographer. What next?

Interior decororator Action Man?

Okay. I've had my sook.

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