|
The 3 types of liars: Liars, Damn Liars, and Politicians.
|
 |
|
|
Search
PlanetMadDog.com
|
 |
|
|
|
| MadDog's
WinAMP |
|
|
Last song played:
Trauma - I'm a Pumpkin Man - SLAY Radio
PLAYLIST |
|
|
|
 |
<copy> <paste>
"Kill me" <copy> <paste> "Kill me" <copy>
<paste> "Kill me" ...
<<
PREVIOUS PAGE OF CRAP - NEXT PAGE
OF CRAP >>
|
MadDog
|
hooray for wacky loud people in the cafe....
|
|
Hatch
|
yeah.. ah.. might have to check
it out.. |
|
MadDog
|
we'll go kick their asses... |
|
Hatch
|
yeah.. the maggots.. asses of
theirs are gone.. |
|
Hatch
|
Arrghh.. the first time I check
out how many messages in my helpdesk folder for email.. and I've
got 666 in there.. I'm freaking out. |
|
MadDog
|
I have a poof named Otto...
|
|
Hatch
|
I'm glad you have a poof named
Otto.. |
|
MadDog
|
and I sat on him last night...
|
|
Hatch
|
you sat on a poof? Interesting
theory... |
|
MadDog
|
yeah.. named otto...
but most of the time I just had my feet on him...
|
|
Hatch
|
So.. like a foot warmer.. Hmmm..
I see.. |
|
MadDog
|
nahh.. more of a foot elevator...
|
|
Hatch
|
Hmmm.. so let me get this right..
he's a poof,
his names Otto,
He elevates your feet somehow,
I'm guessing thru magical tropical poofo powers...
and he maybe... (not fully confirmed) a type foot warmer?
|
|
Hatch
|
YaYY.. I got a reply from "That
70's show"... I mailed before chrissy.. saying happy chrissy to
them, and telling them that Laura Prepon chick was groovy.. the
girl with the red hair on the show.. hehehe |
|
MadDog
|
heheh.. what did they say? |
|
Hatch
|
Just thanx for the email, and
to keep watching.. but still good that they replyed.. Hopefully
she got my message and I'll see her at my place tonight, for a shag
or two. |
|
MadDog
|
or three |
|
Hatch
|
Yes indeedy! |
|
MadDog
|
Hey... guess who I am...
"Ow... .... Ow... ... "
|
|
Hatch
|
Um.. some guy on fire? |
|
MadDog
|
no... brittney spears... |
|
MadDog
|
A typical day for a gorilla is to get up early
and eat. It eats until it gets hot, then it will nap. When it
gets up from its nap, they resume eating until the sun goes down.
That does it - when I grow up, I'm going to be a gorilla.
|
|
Hatch
|
hehehe.. sounds good. |
|
Hatch
|
you should have registered
www.jizzbusters.com
|
|
MadDog
|
is it free? |
|
Hatch
|
sure is.. |
|
MadDog
|
you should get it! |
|
Hatch
|
yeah.. and then I can have the catch phrase..
"cum check out this site.."
hehehe
|
|
MadDog
|
Large blue beasties are eating my brain!!!!
|
|
MadDog
|
Ive lost my mind again... |
|
MadDog
|
Is this annoying yet... |
|
MadDog
|
hey... did you enjoy your little
sleep? |
|
MadDog
|
little sleepyboy... |
|
MadDog
|
with the little pyjamas... and
the teddy... |
|
MadDog
|
heheh... bloody hell.. hurry
up and read all these!!! |
|
MadDog
|
I cant believe you used $40
worth of stamps... what did you do? eat them? |
|
MadDog
|
Hatchy hatchy stamp eater....
|
|
MadDog
|
Dont make me kick you ass monkey
boy!!! |
|
MadDog
|
*thrusts pelvis* |
|
MadDog
|
oops! |
|
MadDog
|
Okay.. gonna stop now.... |
|
MadDog
|
riiiiiiiight..... |
|
MadDog
|
NOW! |
|
MadDog
|
jawatch neighbourse last night?
|
|
Hatch
|
yeah.. for sure.. felecity was
on.. |
|
MadDog
|
yeah... did you se the bit with
me on it where I shagged her silly??? Oh yeah.. they had to cut
that bit out... oh well.. it was fun to film... |
|
Hatch
|
Noooooooo.. stop saying this..
you can't.. you'll ruin her innocence.. |
|
MadDog
|
Hell no.. she's a bad girl...
|
|
Hatch
|
ooh.. bad girl.. I like that..
:-) |
|
MadDog
|
I picture your decapitated head resting on my
new ceiling fan...
|
|
Hatch
|
is it that low.. arrghhh |
|
MadDog
|
heheheh.. yeah... you should
be right.. just dont yawn or anything.. you'll lose your arms...
|
|
Hatch
|
lhahaha.. *mental note.. don't
yawn* |
|
Hatch
|
thats the most fucked up icq
new I've ever heard.. |
|
MadDog
|
its a choccobo! |
|
Hatch
|
its fucked... I'm telling you..
I'm the authority on whats fucked and what isn't, and i'm telling
you its totally fucked up right there dude.. |
|
MadDog
|
fuck yooooo |
|
Hatch
|
ok.. I believe you. |
|
MadDog
|
yay |
|
Hatch
|
YaYY for the pommy chick out
in the cafe wearing a white g-string..woohoo.. |
|
MadDog
|
*quick trip to snack bar* |
|
Hatch
|
Did you know that the color
of the wind after eating a super burrito is green? It's kinda chunky
too... |
|
Hatch
|
Hey.. that chick asked me what
I was doing tomorrow, and said I was doing stuff with you.. think
she wanted to get together with me.. how bout that.. might see her
at the yahoo bar tomorrow, so we gotta go.. |
|
MadDog
|
yeah.. arrange a time.... yeah!!! |
|
Hatch
|
coolies.. scotties gonna go
too. |
|
MadDog
|
and thanx for not blowing me
off.. :o) |
|
MadDog
|
and not blowing me of literally...
eyuuuu |
|
MadDog
|
God told me youre fucked in the head!
|
|
Hatch
|
no.. god didn't say I was fucked
in the head.. so fuck yooooouuuu..... |
|
MadDog
|
oh sorry.. I meant to say "God
told me 'Braden's fucked in the head... ... oh and heplays with
himself.'" |
|
Hatch
|
nooooooooo |
|
MadDog
|
MR WEATHER MAAAAAAN!!!....
MR WEEAAAATHER MAAAN!!!
IT'S RAAAAINING!!!
PLEASE STOP THE RAIN!!!..... .....
.....
..... thankyou.. good night...
|
|
Hatch
|
ok.. I'll believe you this one
time. |
|
MadDog
|
hehhehe.. guess what that's all about...
MR WEEAATHER MAAAN!!
|
|
Hatch
|
I have no idea? |
|
MadDog
|
Gracie went into the hallway
last night when it started raining and said that... knocking on
the bedroom door... heheheh... she was asleep at the time... heheh...
So I squirted her with the spray bottle.... HAAA!! |
|
Hatch
|
and she said.. Mr weather man?
|
|
MadDog
|
do you think she would find it funny, if I made
some message, but accidently send one to her saying something
like..
"Hey Michael, do you know anything bout dns,
cause I can't get this fucken cunt arse motherfucker going, and
its fucking pissing me so off, I want to go and root dead babies???"
do ya reckon she'd take that as a joke?
|
|
Hatch
|
I'd advise against it, or else
she may get her Nan to kill you... |
|
MadDog
|
... with her "Nan of Death"
kung-fu style.... |
|
Hatch
|
hehehe.. yeah.. I might take
the dead babies thing out.. |
|
Hatch
|
ok.. Im gonna send a message
thru to her now.. so act like nothing is happening.. |
|
MadDog
|
are you sure??????? |
|
Hatch
|
too late.. |
|
MadDog
|
gahhhhhhhh ... noooo!!! dont
say I didnt warn you.... |
|
Hatch
|
oh well.. she can get her super
granny onto me.. |
|
MadDog
|
Nan, Braden... its Nan... |
|
Hatch
|
I think I got away with it.. |
|
MadDog
|
You'll find out if you wake
up tomorrow.... |
|
Hatch
|
hehehe.. yeah.. I can take on
any nan no worries.. I've been doing weights.. |
|
MadDog
|
but not a satan-spawn nan....
|
|
Hatch
|
hahaha.. nan of satan.. |
|
MadDog
|
Beezlenan... |
|
Hatch
|
hehehe.. A current-o-nan... |
|
MadDog
|
The Naninator.. |
|
Hatch
|
Conan the nanbarian... |
|
MadDog
|
The Nanny.. heheh |
|
Hatch
|
Good Nan Hunting |
|
MadDog
|
Be pressing the buttons and making the evil things
become explode!! All the enemies will die and all the things will
be broken - that is the law of the shooter!!
|
|
MadDog
|
"Cabbages and Potatoes"
Thats what you should be saying when youre pretending
to say stuff.. thats what the extras on Neighbours say... take
a tip from the pros....
|
|
Hatch
|
hehehe.. or penis and vaginas..
thats what the guys in the back ground of porno
movies say!
|
|
MadDog
|
i like to poop -- and then I poop again, cuz
it's never gonna get me down... I like to poop and then I crap
again - and then I sometimes eat my poops.... I like to shit -
and then I shit again - cuz it's never gonna get me down! I LIKE
TO POOP!!!!!!
|
|
Hatch
|
I'll give you 5 cents if you
get her to say in a Professor Frink voice, "According to my calculations"..
and record that.. I reckon that would sound pretty cool... |
|
MadDog
|
hehehhe... I'll get her to say
"According to elemantary chaos theory, all robots will eventually
turn against their masters in an orgy of mayhem with the kicking
and biting and the hurting and the pushing and the shoving... " |
|
Hatch
|
hehehe.. yup.. groovy.. I'll
be looking forward to the results.. |
|
MadDog
|
yo I am brazil wanna chaat yo
|
|
Hatch
|
I normally would abuse someone
who messages me with a comment like that, but I will refrain from
that this one time. count yourself lucky! |
|
MadDog
|
phew.. |
|
Hatch
|
F U Mudda Fuffa... |
|
MadDog
|
*GASP!* |
|
Hatch
|
Gasp?? Whats that meant to mean....
what are you .. batman?
|
|
MadDog
|
i AM batman! |
|
Hatch
|
Have you ever danced in the pale moonlight?
*think it goes something like that*
|
|
MadDog
|
you mean danced WITH THE DEVIL? |
|
Hatch
|
yeah.. or Satan even... something
like that. |
|
MadDog
|
Satan sucks knob... |
|
Hatch
|
hehehe... I understand his dilemma..
|
|
MadDog
|
Hello and welcome back. I'm joined today by Hatch,
star of the new Hollywood blockbuster, "Ernest Gets His Fucking
Head Cut Off by a Freak Waffle Iron Accident".
|
|
Hatch
|
ooohoooo for Ernest... |
|
MadDog
|
Florida University (at) Cape Kennedy heheh..
F.U.C.K.! hehehe
|
|
Hatch
|
woohoo.. wish I hadda gone to
F.U.C.K univeristy.. I hear the chicks go right orrff there.. |
|
Hatch
|
I did all for the COOKIE..
uh the COOKIE uh..
the COOKIE..
so you can taste me cookies..
I baked it in the OVEN,
baked it in the OVEN,
baked it in the OVEN.
My alternate chefs version of Nookie...
|
|
MadDog
|
"sir, I'm asking you ONE more time... DID YOU
LOOK DIRECTLY AT THE PENIS?"
|
|
Hatch
|
hehe.. I understand your dilemma |
|
MadDog
|
you dont understand shit man... nobody understands...
you dont know what its like to be adopted!!!
Braden.. Youre acting like a real jerk lately,
you know that? You just leave harold alone.. Were just trying
to help...
|
|
Hatch
|
Well sorry ... PAUL lover..
:-) |
|
MadDog
|
Youre such a little brat |
|
Hatch
|
You are such a rupunzal loving
goose eye chicken sandwhich biting delivery boy ... ya know that..
|
|
MadDog
|
uve got cerebral herpes |
|
Hatch
|
you've.. um.. you.. yeah.. you've
got.. got milk.. :-) |
|
MadDog
|
Thats the 3rd time that hippy dredlock guy has
been to the toilet in the last 10 minutes... I think he may be
incontinent
|
|
Hatch
|
hahhaa.. or maybe he's stealing
our toilet paper. |
|
MadDog
|
I think he may... |
|
Hatch
|
and hiding it up his arse..
|
|
MadDog
|
hiding it in his hair.. |
|
Hatch
|
or swallowing them, then turding
them out, and wiping his arse to clean up the mess. |
|
MadDog
|
possibly... I think... |
|
Hatch
|
no where on the web can I find
how to do the death touch.. this sux.. |
|
MadDog
|
Ask me... I know all |
|
Hatch
|
Um.. how do I kill people? |
|
MadDog
|
like this...
*kills you*
|
|
Hatch
|
ahhh... :-) |
|
MadDog
|
*revives you with leaves from the mana tree*
There my child... are you enligtened?
|
|
Hatch
|
Ooh.. mana tree tasty.. yummy
yummy! |
|
MadDog
|
Good... now be off with you...
|
|
Hatch
|
I'm fucking scary.. |
|
MadDog
|
*whimper* |
|
Hatch
|
I thought so little one.. come
with me, and pray to the light, that the evil one has become quiet
once again, and is at ease with the gods of the shaolin monks of
braden temple. |
|
MadDog
|
is that like Shirley Temple? |
|
Hatch
|
yup.. she's my god. |
|
MadDog
|
She's pretty cool... |
|
Hatch
|
Yeah.. I know.. she comes from
the Goodship Lollypop ya know.. |
|
MadDog
|
|
|
Hatch
|
|
|
MadDog
|
|
|
Hatch
|
|
|
MadDog
|
|
|
Hatch
|
|
|
MadDog
|
|
|
Hatch
|
|
|
MadDog
|
|
|
Hatch
|
|
|
MadDog
|
|
|
Hatch
|
|
|
MadDog
|
|
|
Hatch
|
|
|
MadDog
|
|
|
Hatch
|
|
|
MadDog
|
|
|
MadDog
|
|
|
Hatch
|
|
|
MadDog
|
|
|
Hatch
|
|
|
MadDog
|
|
|
Hatch
|
|
|
MadDog
|
|
|
Hatch
|
|
|
MadDog
|
|
|
Hatch
|
|
|
MadDog
|
|
|
Hatch
|
|
|
MadDog
|
|
|
Hatch
|
|
|
MadDog
|
|
|
Hatch
|
|
|
MadDog
|
|
|
MadDog
|
|
|
Hatch
|
|
|
MadDog
|
|
|
Hatch
|
|
|
MadDog
|
|
|
Hatch
|
|
|
MadDog
|
|
|
Hatch
|
|
|
MadDog
|
|
|
Hatch
|
|
|
MadDog
|
|
|
Hatch
|
|
|
MadDog
|
|
|
Hatch
|
|
|
MadDog
|
|
|
Hatch
|
|
|
MadDog
|
|
|
MadDog
|
|
|
Hatch
|
|
|
MadDog
|
|
|
Hatch
|
|
|
MadDog
|
|
|
Hatch
|
|
|
MadDog
|
|
|
Hatch
|
|
|
MadDog
|
|
|
Hatch
|
|
|
MadDog
|
|
|
Hatch
|
|
|
MadDog
|
|
|
Hatch
|
|
|
MadDog
|
|
|
Hatch
|
|
|
MadDog
|
|
|
MadDog
|
|
|
Hatch
|
|
|
MadDog
|
|
|
Hatch
|
|
|
MadDog
|
|
|
Hatch
|
|
|
MadDog
|
|
|
Hatch
|
|
|
MadDog
|
|
|
Hatch
|
|
|
MadDog
|
|
|
Hatch
|
|
|
MadDog
|
|
|
Hatch
|
|
|
MadDog
|
|
|
Hatch
|
|
|
MadDog
|
|
|
MadDog
|
|
|
Hatch
|
|
|
MadDog
|
|
|
Hatch
|
|
|
MadDog
|
|
|
Hatch
|
|
|
MadDog
|
|
|
Hatch
|
|
|
MadDog
|
|
|
Hatch
|
|
|
MadDog
|
|
|
Hatch
|
|
|
MadDog
|
|
|
Hatch
|
|
|
MadDog
|
|
|
Hatch
|
|
|
MadDog
|
|
<<
PREVIOUS PAGE OF CRAP - NEXT PAGE
OF CRAP >>
|
